Castration in Hollywood

I have witnessed the castration of a man in film.  It was horrible.

I almost feel sorry for Gerald Butler. He has gone from the manliest of men to a cowering wimp in the span of two films.

In the movie “300″, Butler started as the mighty King Leonidas of Sparta, a courageous leader and fearless warrior. He was the gold standard of what a man should be and yielded ground to no one.  When the Persian messenger threatened his country and mouthed off to his queen, he kindly let the messenger know how he felt about it by putting his foot up his ass and kicking him into a bottomless pit.  That was some real man sh*t.  Made me want to get my spear out of my closet and tag along.

Now, I’m not here to debate the historical accuracy of the film or how you feel about the courageous, light Spartans being pitted against the dark, evil Persians.  I’m just saying Leonidas was a bad muthaf*cka, and he wasn’t taking too much sh*t from anybody.

Fast forward to a film called “The Ugly Truth”, where Butler co-starred with Katherine Heigl as Mike Chadway, a public access TV host with a unique perspective on relationship.  At first, Chadway was on some manly stuff from his to-the-point insight to strippers in jello, but in the end, the turned into a little b*tch, confessing his love for Heigl’s character on some “happy ever after” bullsh*t.

(Some of the men reading this may be asking yourselves, “TrueMan, what the hell are you doing seeing ‘The Ugly Truth’?”  Fair question.  Let’s just say I was with a female acquaintance who wanted me to see it and she can be very…convincing.  Don’t act like I’m the only one that’s ever done that.)

Leonidas and Mike Chadway are the polar opposites of manliness in Hollywood.  I’m on Leonidas’ team.

Leonidas isn’t a cro-magnon, dragging wife by the hair and ordering her around. Quite the opposite.  He listens to his wife and takes her feelings and opinions into account, but he is the king and takes charge as he needs to.  Leonidas always makes sure his queen feels valued, but when it’s time to make a decision, he steps up the plate, mans up, and does what needs to be done.

Mike Chadway is a little punk ass who caves in at the end and lets himself get pushed around by Heigl until he breaks. Sad.

I’m not saying a man should be stone-faced or that he should never listen to his lady.  What I am saying is that a man should have a backbone and be a man.  If Leonidas met Mike Chadway in the street, he’d put his foot up his ass.

Hollywood, personally, I’d like to see more Leonidas-es than Chadways.  Give us better examples of what a man can be.  Save Chadway for Oprah when she does specials about “Men Who Lack Testicular Fortitude.”

THIS IS SPARTA!!!!!!

Feel free to comment.

“Then Again, I Always Been Lucky When It Comes To Killin’ Folk”

I just finished watching “Unforgiven” on AMC; it’s one of my all-time favorite movies along with “A Soldier’s Story” and “The Five Deadly Venoms” (shout out to all my old school Channel 5 Kung Fu Theater heads out there).

“Unforgiven” is a 1992 western starring and directed by Clint Eastwood,who plays the lead character, William Munny.  Munny is a man who tried to change his life of crime but is drawn back to what he is.  He , his best friend and fellow reformed outlaw Ned (played by Morgan Freeman), and a young gun called “The Schofield Kid” (Jaimz Woolvett),  seek to collect a bounty placed on two men who cut up a town whore.  During the search, Ned is killed by sheriff Lil’ Bill (Gene Hackman) and Munny realizes that he has to be who he is, an outlaw without conscience and killer of women and children.  The climax of the movie is the final confrontation between Munny and Lil’ Bill and his band of deputies.  Munny kills them all and rides off into the dark rainy night.

“You better bury Ned right, and you better not cut or otherwise harm no whores.  Or I’ll come back and kill all you sons of b*tches.”

That got me to thinking…when we say that we’ve changed, are we just lying to ourselves?  Do we ever really change or are we what we are and is all that “change” just fancy window dressing?

I know that we change. We grow physically, become more educated, and even (supposedly) mature with age.  But does that change who we are?  We go through trials and tribulations and are molded by experience, but do we really change at our core?

William Munny thought he changed.  He married and had two children.  He and his family took to farm life, raising crops.  They lived in peace. But Munny really wasn’t good at farm life; it really wasn’t what he wanted, even though he tried to embrace the change  After his wife died and he was left to raise his children on his own, it got even harder.  Eventually, he went back to what he was good at, “killin’ folk”, as he put it.  In the end, he was what he was,  even if that was a ruthless killer with an evil disposition.

Sometimes,  I hear people talk about how relationships, having a good man or woman in your life,  will foster change, or that if you “find God”, that  will add something that will bring the best out in you…

(Note:  I always shake my head when people say they “found God.”  That is something people said to puff up their pride and feel good about themselves.  You don’t “find God”.  God was never lost, you were; God finds you when he thinks you’re ready to accept him.  I always wondered about that.  Anyway, back to the topic at hand.)

I disagree with that.  I think that we all have a core set of values, beliefs, and even mannerisms that define who we are.  Those don’t really change, and I don’t think any relationship or experience will change that.  Think back to all the times y0u promised yourself you’d change something.  Did you always follow through?  Is it so hard to accept who we are?

I’m not trying to imply that change isn’t good.  If you’re an absentee or a bad father, dammit, do right by your kids and become a better one.  But what do you do if it’s just not in you? How do you go against who you are, the fabric of your being, and become something you weren’t meant to be?

How do you accept who you are, even if that isn’t who you want to be?  I don’t think William Munny wanted to be a ruthless killer, or else he wouldn’t have tried to change…but in the end, that’s who he was.

Can you accept who you are, even if it’s not who you want to be?  And be honest with yourself? Do you think we can change who we are at our core?  Feel free to comment.

The Mission

I was listening to some old school rap the other day on the Sirius Backspin station (love that station).  Special Ed came over my Sirius Radio with his song “The Mission.”  One of the lyrics is , “well, I was coolin’ at the crib with this girl Suzanne, and everything was goin’ just accordin’ to plan…”  That had me thinking…

Imagine this, fellas.  You meet a young lady on a night out or invite someone over.  There is some stimulating conversation, eye contact, a light touch on the arm.  The personal space between you is getting less and less by the second.  Perhaps a kiss.   The next thing you know, the two of you are alone in a dark room in the throws of passion.  It’s on.

The next morning (or even later that night. Damn fellas, ginseng), the two of you lay there for a moment, her snuggled up next to you with her head on your chest.  You gently kiss her on the head and think “Yes, that was awesome. Everything went just as planned.”

…according to your plan…or hers?

Women are a lot more aggressive these days in all aspects of their lives, career, finances, education (nothing wrong with that at all).  Why wouldn’t they be more aggressive in sex?   On occasion, I’ve heard women plotting on men as if they were going to club him over the head and drag him home for what they “needed”.  I used to be taken aback by this, but the more I thought about it, the more I realized that this sort of role reversal was just a natural progression of the times.

I really don’t think we were ready for this.  Perhaps it happened with the change of the family paradigm or some women just got tired of traditional relationships.  Whatever it was, it’s changed the way relationships are.

In the 1992 classic film “Boomerang” (I know I’ve referenced it before ,but it’s a classic; if you haven’t seen it, rent it this weekend).  The character of Jacqueline Boyer (played by Robin Givins) represents what many women are involving into now:  a female that is successful, aggressive, and unapologetic.

There was one scene where Marcus Graham (played by Eddie Murphy) bought tickets for he and Jacqueline to go to a show…except she never showed up and had him waiting outside the theater like a fool.  She didn’t call to say she would be late and Marcus was calling everywhere to see if she was alright. Later, Jacqueline shows up at his crib damn near “butt ass neck-ed”, bangs his brains out, puts $200 on the dresser for him like he’s a project ho, and leaves!  No cuddle time or pillow talk involved.  Damn!

When “Boomerang” came out, many thought Jacqueline would be nothing more than a fictional character that would never play out in the real world.  Fast forward as we move towards 2010.  I’m sure we all know a few “Jacqueline’s”.

Funny thing.  Recently I went out with some friends and overheard two men talking (I tried not to listen, it was hard not to).  One guy was talking with the other about a woman he’d recently met.  He couldn’t understand what happened between them.  Their relationship seemed to be going well, but after they’d had sex a few times, it seemed like she didn’t want to see him anymore and wouldn’t return any of his calls.  It seemed like sex was all she wanted from him.  He wanted to know what happened.

What happened was everything went according to plan…

If you know a Jacqueline or just want to comment, feel free…